Lovely Goddess; Cause Life is Damn Beautiful

For the past few weeks, I haven't been feeling good about myself. I kept describing and just putting down my own self, and I was doing the haters a favor, not that I know I have any, but if I have, they would be celebrating now.  The thing is, I haven't been feeling grateful about the way things are now, which had turned me into a deeppppp depression. I felt like crying for no reason, I wanted to run away, I just became the 'not happy me'. I was obsessed and became upset for the things I don't have, and wild thoughts did come into my mind and the only person I told about when I was in the deepest depression was him and his response was, 'you're crazy'. hahaha Yet, I wasn't angry at him when he said that, as a matter of fact, I did agree with him. 'you know, maybe you're right, maybe I am crazy, I should go see a doctor.'  It freaked him out. hahahahaha.. I wasn't doing it on purpose but honestly, I did feel like going to

Hi blog. It's 2.30 a.m. and I am wide awake. It's because I am freaking hungry. Lolz.  I slept early last night, before 9 I was already in bed. Yesterday was an awesome day. I went out in the morning to send my little sister to her school since she needed to buy school stuff there. And then my father and I went to the nearest mall and bought my youngest brother his school uniform.  Then we wanted to come back to my sister but she called and said she was gonna be long, so we headed to tanjung dawai. That is our favourite place to buy dried anchovies. It was pretty awesome there. We bought the dried anchovies for over 100 ringgit. Haha. Puas hati kot!  The drive was quite long as it took us 45 minutes to reach there, but we managed to go anyway.  Then we headed home after fetching our little sister.  Afterwards I followed my dad to go for his work, which is car towing. It was fun but I wasn't feeling well already. Soon as we got home I got pretty sick an

And so my sister kemas2 bilik, she looooveeeee to throw out old things. Here goes the conversation. Kilah: wey aripah, hang punya ka bedak sejuk ataih laci tu? Arifah: dak. Aku punya dah habih. Kak hang punya ka bedak sejuk pink tu? Me: ha. Aku punya. Jangan buang. Kilah: aku bukan cakap pasai bedak sejuk pink! Aku cakap pasai ni (tunjuk bedak nyonya bukan bedak sejuk!) Me: tu bedak nyonya bukan bedak sejuk!!! Bodo piang la hang ni. Hahahahahaha

House work. It's never ending. Never! Even though i am just helping my mom, i get tired. Now i have just finished cleaning up the living room. Before i was cleaning out fish and washing bunch of dishes. Luckily i have enough training when it comes to big family especially when there are boys around. They hardly ever wash their plates unless i were there to nag at them. I dont have to have kids to know how to nag anymore. Haha. Sure thing i am looking forward to reading this in the future. 20 years coming if i were still alive. Anyway, i just have to bathe cuz this thing makes me sweat and after i need to cook. See ya! 

The part in me that feels very much incomplete. I dont know why. Maybe i do and i am just denying the fact that i actually do know what the hell is going on in my heart. It aches everytime when i see it. I feel like leaving me and finding the new me.. heh. 

I went to aeon big last night with my family. Half of it anyway. The thing I love so much about aeon big at my place here in Penang is they always have clearance book sale. And the books are only rm5! Freaking cheap. For novel lovers like me. So I bought two books and the genre I have always picked is action thriller. Where it mostly involves killings, kidnapping,and mysteies. This morning, my mom saw the books I bought and she asked me about the books. Here goes our coversation. Mom: kak,buku apa kau beli? Me: action thriller. Ada bunuh-bunuh, culik. Mom: laaa.. mak pon suka baca buku macam tu. Me: haa, amik la baca. Mom: hotak hang. (Lol) mak tak paham pon! Hahahahahahahaha Mom is just so funny.